5 insights men* need to understand
The title of this piece alone might prompt some men* to raise their defenses. The retort “I’m not obligated to do anything” is a common knee-jerk reaction to calls for introspection and change, a sentiment I’m not unfamiliar with myself. However, within the framework of patriarchy, privilege, and systemic inequality, it’s crucial for me to momentarily set aside personal sensitivities to foster an environment conducive to learning and understanding.
This is a necessity. We must grasp the broader contexts that, while affecting us indirectly, disproportionately impact and even endanger other groups. Let’s delve into the concept of privilege first.
Privileges are structurally embedded advantages.
As a cis man, my gender identity aligns with the sex assigned to me at birth, based on physical characteristics. The term “cis,” Latin for “on this side of,” contrasts with “trans,” meaning “across” or “beyond.” This distinction invites us to question the arbitrary lines of normativity drawn by societal structures and who holds the power to interpret them.
But my identity encompasses more: I am white, able-bodied, tall (standing at 1.90 meters), heterosexual, and was born into a relatively privileged family in Germany. These immutable aspects of my identity grant me a level of privilege that provides a systemic tailwind, benefiting from capitalism, racism, and patriarchy without any effort on my part. Yet, the complexity of these systems merits a closer examination.
Patriarchy establishes “double hierarchies”
Men are simultaneously pressured to assert dominance over women and compete against other men, a duality that underscores the insidious nature of patriarchal structures. This is a trap that often lures men* into complicity with a system that actually harms them.
The backlash from men* upon realizing efforts to correct systemic injustices — such as the implementation of women’s quotas — reveals a profound discomfort. For those accustomed to privilege, equality can feel like oppression. Swiss researcher Markus Theunert encapsulates this paradox, highlighting the privileged man’s illusion of equality as the core advantage of men*. This cognitive dissonance is intentional, leading us to our next point.
The purpose of a system is what it does.
This principle, articulated by British cybernetician Stafford Beer, underscores the importance of scrutinizing the outcomes of our societal structures. Are they fulfilling their intended purposes, or have they devolved into mechanisms that disadvantage certain groups to benefit others? The imperative to question every system, as advocated by Ijeoma Oluo, is not an invitation to conspiracy theorizing but a call for a constructively critical and democratic approach to systemic transformation:
“To free ourselves, we must question each and every system we are in — even those we cannot divorce ourselves from yet.“
A comprehensive analysis of systemic conditions requires a holistic perspective, considering not only structures and processes but also culture, communication, individual behaviors, and the interplay between these elements. This approach enables a nuanced understanding of systemic imbalances and their implications for dialogue and change.
“Old white cis-hetero man” doesn’t qualify as an insult.
Instead, it intentionally simplifies complex issues of privilege and systemic imbalance. It’s not an individual indictment but a critique of overrepresentation and systemic bias. Recognizing one’s privilege does not imply guilt but underscores a responsibility to leverage that privilege towards systemic fairness and justice.
And indeed, with privilege there comes responsibility. The more privileged I am, the greater this responsibility is. Looking beyond potential triggers whenever someone is bringing this up, is key. The good news is that by understanding this, I can become part of the solution. But before that, I might have some work to do. It’s still complicated.
Even with the best intentions. I can be part of a problem.
Acknowledging the “patriarchal dividend,” as termed by sociologist Raewyn Connell, is crucial. It highlights the unearned benefits men* receive within a patriarchal system, without implying uniform advantages or denying possible benefits to women.
The challenge extends beyond recognizing privilege to confronting the broader implications of our roles within these systems. For instance, a woman’s wariness in a dimly lit street reflects not personal suspicion but a rational response to systemic threats. Understanding one’s potential complicity in these structures is the first step toward meaningful change.
*The use of an asterisk after “men” signals an awareness of the limitations of binary gender categories, advocating for a recognition of gender diversity and fluidity.
This text is a translation from this original blogpost.
Show notes:
- Quote by Markus Theunert from this NZZ interview: https://www.nzz.ch/nzz-am-sonntag/man-tut-so-als-waere-es-erstrebenswert-mann-zu-sein-ld.1737954 ↩︎
- Quote by Ijeoma Oluo from the preface to: Tulshyan, Ruchika. Inclusion on Purpose. Cambridge, Mass., MIT Press. 2022. ↩︎
